10. Marry me - Assuage

[moonshadows]

“So it’s over, then?”

Jaina sighs, staring at the statue of her late mentor. “It’s over. Tari…I still can’t hate him, even after all he’s done. I just hope he’s finally at peace.”

Silently, I take her hand and squeeze reassuringly as she dabs at her eyes with a white cloth.

“Jaina?”

Over my shoulder, I pin the king of Stormwind with a look warning him not to intrude, but his eyes narrow stubbornly. “Your Majesty-“

Jaina’s hand squeezing mine interrupts me. “Let him stay.”

I hold the glare a moment longer as the set of his eyes shifts to pleading, then release it with a nod. He comes around to her other side and, to my surprise, pulls her into a rough hug that she does not fight.

“Varian…” Whatever she might have said dies as her throat closes up. She lets go of my hand to put it on his chest as she lays her head against his shoulder.

“I knew him, too, remember?” His voice is low and husky, and his eyes dare me to make a comment.

“I just…can’t help thinking. Maybe…if I hadn’t said no…”

“If he chose to do those things of his free will, then the prince we knew was dead before he ever left Lordaeron,” Varian growls. “If he did not, then he was murdered before he ever took that cursed sword.” He releases Jaina enough to take her chin in one hand for force her to meet his gaze. “I know you tried your best; you never give anything less than your best effort. But I am proof that you can show a man the truth, and he can still refuse to see it. If he couldn’t understand that you were trying to help him, then he was not worthy of you either as a friend or as…something more.”

He holds her gaze until she nods.

“You can’t make another’s choices for them,” he says in a more gentle tone, letting his hand drop. “Even the act of letting someone else choose is a choice. Remember him as he was, Jaina. Not what he became. Mourn the man he could have been, but don’t throw yourself onto the funeral pyre with him.”

A few tears slip down her cheeks and she swallows, unable to speak, but nods to show agreement.

“On that note…” He glances at me and his face colors. “I want to say that while I may not understand the choices you made, I respect your right to make them.”

“What do you mean, Varian?” Jaina asks cautiously.

“Tandred told me you gave up any claim to the throne of Kul Tiras, but declined to tell me what might have made you do that. I know we were never close growing up, so I don’t know what kind of relations you had with your family, but I know that you are a strong, intelligent woman and I have no doubt that your choices are not made foolishly.” The scars on his face twist his grin into something mildly horrifying. “If I’d had any doubts on that score, the news that you helped defeat the Burning Legion would have laid them to rest. There were those who called you crazy for packing up half the navy and sailing off like that, but in the end, you had your reasons and they were good ones.”  He takes a deep breath and lets it out. “So while I may not understand why you made the choices you did, I  trust you to know what you’re doing.”

“Thank you,” she says slowly. “That means a lot to me.”

The warped smile comes back. “Your brother’s not going to like it, but I owe you at least that much. You helped me when I needed it, and you wouldn't have been there to help if you hadn't made the choices you did. Stormwind still stands because you were in Theramore. That's a debt I'm not sure I can ever repay."

Jaina smiles with a hint of mischief. "If I make a choice you object to in the future, I'll remind you of that."

"And I'm sure Taretha will hold me to it even if you don't," Varian says without even the slightest hint of an edge in his voice. He actually sounds...happy. "I look forward to seeing Theramore when I'm not on the run and split in half."

"It’s liable to be cold and rainy on the first day of spring, but maybe the shamans can work with that. The symbolism of the day is worth a little bad weather, I think. When are you and Thrall going to make the announcement?"

He looks at me, silently asking permission before he says, "Two weeks. We don't want to give the impression that we're making light of what just happened. I'll take my leave of you for now, though." He sketches a bow to her, and a deeper one to me. "My presence is making Taretha uncomfortable."

Jaina glances at me, and her lips compress. "Alright. Thank you."

Once my future husband is out of sight, she tugs me over to a bench and sits next to me.

"Tari, are you really alright with marrying him?"

I take a breath, feeling the shell of emotional ice crack with that shuddering inhalation, not realizing until that moment that I had retreated behind it. "I have to be."

This answer doesn't satisfy her, unsurprisingly. "No. That's not good enough. I can't stop you from going into this if you're not completely comfortable with it, but I won't leave you helpless, either. We're in the city of mages; I'm going to find a solution. We're not going to abandon you, Tari."

"Jaina, you don't...he's not going to..." I stumble to a halt at her determined look.

She waves one hand dismissively. "I know he'd be more likely to cut his own liver out than deliberately hurt you, but that doesn't erase the things you went through...and it doesn't guarantee that he won't do something accidentally. Even if you never need to use it, Thrall and I both would feel better if you had some kind of secret weapon so that you don't feel trapped and helpless."

I know better than to argue with Jaina when she's focused like this. Actually, I'd rather she be distracted fussing over me than fretting over what she thinks she should have done to prevent Arthas's fall.

"Okay, you win. What did you have in mind?"

She grins, and I find myself grinning back. "I've got a few ideas."