Testing the system

[moonshadows]

“Ms. Kyle, thank you for meeting with me.” Jonathan Chesterfield offers me his hand. I take it, and allow him to seat me at the small table. He sits, glancing at the menu, then puts it back down. “I couldn’t help overhearing you talking to Mr. Wayne at Veronica’s little bash the other night.”

I’m suddenly grateful that we’re both so paranoid. “Oh?”

“You were telling him about how shoddy the security on the Vreeland jewels was. At first, I laughed it off, but – you were the Catwoman, and you were brought in by Batman himself. That means you were good. I’m finishing my new gallery, and hearing your comments made me very nervous about the safety of anything I put there.”

My gaze drops into ‘chilly’. “I’m retired, Mr. Chesterfield. You have nothing to worry about from me.” The menu falls from my hands and I reach for my purse.

“No, wait, that’s not – you have the wrong idea!” he babbles. “I want to hire you!”

I pause. “Hire me?”

“To test my security!”

That gets my attention. “Let me get this straight. You want to pay me to break into your new gallery.”

He nods frantically. “You have an insider’s knowledge. You can tell me where I’ve got holes on the system. Give me a chance to fix them before I open. You can’t be too careful in this town.”

“Alright.” I pick the menu back up. “Let’s talk.”

 

*******************************

 

A faint rustle behind me lets me know I’m not alone on the roof.

“And just what do you think you’re doing?”

I don’t look up from the back window I’m examining. “Not right now, darling. I’m on the clock. Hmmm, wire mesh embedded in the glass, and…” One claw follows the tiny filament. “…yes, hooked into the security system. Excellent. I’ll have to find another way in.”

“Catwoman…” Batman growls threateningly, but I’m already climbing down the side of the building.

“I told you, I’m on the clock. You can come along if you like, just don’t damage anything.”

There, the bathroom window. The glass is clear, there’s no wires, and it’s not even locked. I narrate as much, the tape recorder on my wrist picking up every comment. It’s hardly a challenge to slide the window open and slip inside. It’s a bit trickier for Batman, but his shoulders are deliciously broad. I unlock the bathroom door, and we slip into the hall.

“Rotating cameras – sloppy. An intruder can time his or her motions and slide right by. Motion detectors would be better. Don’t rely on that laser tripwire, either.” I hop over the glowing red line barely visible in the dark.

“Watch out!”

I freeze, and notice the second tripwire at waist height. “…excellent work. The second laser would have caught me.”

Together, we make our way into the gallery, with me narrating our trek every step of the way. I nudge Isis, and she leaps down to pick her way unerringly between the security beams surrounding the pedestal at the center. There’s a glass tube protecting the object on the pedestal, but a bit of makeup in the air illuminates the lasers and it’s the work of half a minute to lift the tube enough for Isis to slip underneath and retreat with her prize. Once she’s resumed her perch, I set the glass down and step back a few paces. A few last comments, and I switch off the recorder.

“You can turn the lights on now, Mr. Chesterfield,” I call.

Batman starts as the lights come on, and my temporary employer steps out of a back room, grinning broadly. “How’d I do, Ms. Kyle?”

“No so well, Mr. Chesterfield.” I toss him the catnip mousie and then the tape. “Listen to that; I kept a running commentary of what could be improved and what was good the way it is.”

He smiles at me. “I can’t thank you enough for this. Listen, can I set up a follow-up visit? Say, three weeks from now?” He’s already pulling out his checkbook. “Give me time to implement your professional suggestions and then see if I missed anything?”

“Tell you what,” I smile. “I’ll come back in three weeks, and if I can’t get the prize without triggering an alarm, I won’t charge anything.”

“That’s good incentive! I’ll send the agreement by in the morning. Now, that was three thousand-“

“Two.” I nod at my silent companion. “Bat discount. He pointed out a few that I missed.”

Chesterfield beams at the stoic Dark Knight and hands me the check before starting another one. “Well then, Batman, which charitable organization do you want this thousand-dollar check made out to?”

Clearly startled, he stammers out the name of a rescue mission and accepts his check. I reclaim Isis’s catnip mousie, and it’s not long before Batman and I are alone on a nearby rooftop.

“Charity?”

Ah, my taciturn guardian of the night. “This two thousand is going to a no-kill animal shelter. I’m not trying to make a profit off of people using Catwoman’s skills. Call it civic service, if you will.”

That takes him by surprise. “I’m sorry. I thought – well, you had Isis with you…”

And I only bring my cat with me for heists. My lips twitch into a smile. “You thought I was slipping. Don’t worry; I made sure everything was written out and the agreement signed by both parties. Oh, and don’t be surprised if you see me doing this again – the idea of Catwoman hiring herself out as a non-profit security consultant is a very enticing one.”

The ghost of a smile brushes his lips. “Just another way to fleece the flock – but at least this time, it’s legal. That’s a very clever solution to the problem of trying to keep you in at night. His touch is light, fingers ghosting over the back of my head, but I know what he’s not finding. Batman frowns as his light caress turns into a quick search.

“Looking for something?” I ask, amused.

He grins ruefully at me. “Okay, where did you put it?” He’s referring to the tracking chip he snuck onto my costume a while back.

“That’s for me to know and you to find out,” I purr. One hand traces his broad chest lightly. “Are you going to strip-search me?” My expression teases and invites all at the same time.

Batman’s gin widens. “Don’t tempt me. Seriously though – it led me to you, so I know it’s still somewhere on you.”

I offer him my left hand and he takes it, eyes widening as his probing fingers find the chip inside my glove, at the base of my ring finger.

“Why did you leave it?” he asks, not addressing the subject of the chip’s current location.

I shrug. “Why wouldn’t I want you to be able to find me?”

“That’s a lot of trust.”

“You’ve earned it. Remember the cat food factory.” I tilt my head. “There’s just one thing.”

“What’s that?”

My smile slips. “What if I’m not wearing my costume?”

In shock, he drops my hand. “Well, now I know what my next project is going to be,” he says grimly. Behind the mask, his eyes narrow. “Still, that’s a lot of trust for someone as enthusiastic about freedom and independence as you are.”

Again, I shrug. “I know you won’t abuse it, and you’re not the only one trying to get over trust issues.” My smile is tight and painful.

Batman looks at me a long moment, then nods. Without a word he shoots his grapple gun and flies off into the night.

 

*******************************

 “Catwoman has been seen breaking into several upscale galleries and apartments,” Gordon says as I silently climb down the wall. “You might want to look into that.”

“I already have,” comes Batman’s gravelly voice. “She’s hiring herself out as a non-profit security consultant. I drop in on her little outings every now and then to make sure she’s on the level. She is.”

There’s silence for a moment before Gordon says, “She’s something special to you, isn’t she?” A pause. “I thought so. Why?”

“How many criminals do I put away, Jim? How many get out of jail and go right back to crime?” He sounds anguished.

“I know what you mean, old friend. It’s depressing and you wonder if you’re even making a difference.”

“Knowing that Selina Kyle turned her back on her criminal ways helps me remember that I do make a difference. I changed a life for the better, and not just the life of someone who would have been a victim.”

I climb back up the building. Before I get more than halfway across the roof, however, there’s a whoosh behind me and I know I’m not alone.

“How long were you there?” Batman demands.

I turn to face him. “Long enough.”

“You heard that, then.”

“Yes.”

Hostility radiates from his body, trying to cover the vulnerability he accidentally let me see – the admission of hos important to him I am, the knowledge of how much power over him I have. He turns-

“Wait! Don’t go,” I continue in a less frantic voice.

Batman looks over his shoulder, unmoved, and I run over to him but stop short of arm’s reach.

“I’m not a fool, Batman. I know the stakes; one wrong move and kitty goes to the pound. But that’s not what’s stopping me.”

“Oh?”

It’s amazing how much cynicism he can pack into one syllable. “One wrong move, and I’ll lose the two most important men in my life: you, and Bruce Wayne.”

“I thought you didn’t care for his company.”

“I do. I pretend that I don’t so that your enemies don’t think he’s you.”

“Dangerous tactic. What if he moves on?”

“Then he’ll still be safe.”

Batman grunts. “He’s a grown man, Selina. He deserves to know the truth and have the opportunity to make that choice for himself. If you don’t tell him, I will.”

Without warning the grapple gun goes off and he grabs me around the waist. I cling to him as we shoot into the air, and when we’re safely away on another roof, he grins.

“You’re almost as good an actor as I am. You know Gordon keeps his roof bugged?

“I suspected. What was with that last line? ‘If you don’t tell him, I will’?”

“Too much?”

“I’m just trying to imagine you telling Bruce Wayne how I feel about him.”

He grins at that. “I guess you better tell him, then. Unless Gordon lets the cat out of the bag and saves you the trouble, that is.”

I smile right back. “That could be amusing, too.”

The grin fades, leaving him looking serious. “I want you to be extra careful. Scarecrow’s out and running loose. Until I track him back down…”

“Don’t worry about me. This alley cat doesn’t scare easily.”

“If he gets you with his fear toxin, you won’t have a choice.”

The wild, primal part of my mind grins in feral joy. “His loss if he does.”