moonshadows

Still humming with contentment from having spent Winter’s Veil with his brother, Tyrande, and his nephew, the Lord of Outland was in no mood to be faced with a patrol of fel orcs squabbling with a handful of naga. Although quite a ways down the corridor and around a corner, he could easily pick out enough to tell that the fel orcs had captured an intruder, and the naga were insisting she be brought straight to him rather than being thrown in a dungeon for managing to penetrate the Black Temple. He wanted to turn around and go back the way he’d come and avoid this mess for the time being, but he trusted his naga’s competence. Sighing, he straightened his shoulders and marched around the corner.

“Lord Illidan, these orcs have found-”

“Silence, naga! She’s our prisoner, we’ll-”

“Illidan?”

The third voice, weak and breathy, made the half-demon freeze, one hoof still in the air. It couldn’t be…no, how could it? But the naga were slithering out of the way respectfully, and there she was, held up by the arms between two burly red orcs, dirty and bruised and exhausted but looking at him with undisguised hope.

“Drop her,” he commanded. The harsh edge in his voice took the orcs by surprise and they let go, the slender figure crumpling to the ground. “Leave,” he snarled. “All of you.” The naga fled, the orcs retreated, and only then did he allow himself to rush forward and gather her into his arms. Her pale golden hair was matted, but he pressed his nose to it and inhaled her scent, something inside him unknotting as he did. “Zul’vii,” he moaned, shuddering slightly with the force of tears he could not shed.

“You remember me?” she whispered into his chest, fingers blindly tracing the fel tattoos that swirled across his skin.

“Foolish troll,” he half-growled, throat tight, “we are bonded. If we were separated for ten thousand years, the howling wreck that remained me would still remember you.”

Zul’vii laughed weakly.

“Where have you been these past three years?” he demanded angrily, the effect somewhat ruined by how tenderly he was holding her.

“Ran into some bad juju.” The half-celestial coughed weakly. “Sent me back here, but north. Far north. Didn’t know where I was. Wandered until some of Kael’s people came there to settle; they directed me here, but…” she coughed again. “Wasn’t easy getting here.”

Illidan stood, hefting her weight easily despite her six-foot frame. She was lighter than he remembered, and he frowned. “You haven’t been eating.”

“Nothing good that I could find.”

“Unacceptable,” he snapped, and she smiled. “I’m bringing you to my quarters, and then I will return with something you can eat.”

The world faded and twisted around them, and then Zul’vii found herself laid gently on a nest of tangled sheets and blankets. Something stirred next to her, and a high, sleepy child’s voice said, “Daddy?”

Zul’vii’s heart bled. Had he found himself someone else after all?

“This is Zul’vii,” Illidan said calmly. “She’s someone important to me, like Mommy.”

“Oh.” Small hands grasped the troll’s bicep, and a small body snuggled against her. “’Kay.”

“I’ll return soon with food,” he continued in that same reassuring voice.

Weak with exhaustion and relief, Zul’vii fell into a doze before she could wonder about the child. Illidan’s hand on her other shoulder woke her back up, the scents of fruit, cheese, and bread making her mouth water. As she wondered how to tell him she was too weak to sit up, his arm slipped behind her shoulders and she found herself leaning against his chest, a tray in her lap. His breath on her ear made her shiver.

“Can you feed yourself?” he asked softly, further throwing her off-balance.

“You must’ve really missed me,” she said lightly, trying to hide her reaction to his concern.

“You were gone.” The words were clipped, the way they were when he was keeping his emotions bottled up, and his arm tightened around her waist.

Rather than pursue the subject, Zul’vii reached out with one trembling hand and laboriously brought a piece of fruit to her mouth. While she chewed, she glanced to the side, trying to get a look at the child. When she did, she nearly choked. It was a girl, no more than six, an elf with dark blue hair and a face that made her think of High Priestess Tyrande.

“What’s wrong?”

Illidan’s worried question shook her out of her horror and she swallowed. “The child…”

The half-demon relaxed. “She’s Tyrande’s. My brother sired her, but there is a powerful demon inside her body. They gave her to me to raise because of the demon. Her name is Ember.” He buried his face in her tangled hair. “She is all that kept me sane while you were gone.”

The child wasn’t his. She hadn’t lost him to the woman he’d loved for thousands of years. He’d missed her. A spark of her fierce spirit rekindled, and she smiled. “I think I’m too weak to-”

A wedge of cheese was at her lips before she could finish the sentence. She took a bite and chewed slowly, reveling in having Illidan cater to her like this. She’d often wondered, as they’d squabbled over the years, whether he actually returned her feelings and didn’t know how to express them, or whether he genuinely was irritated by her. Now she knew for certain, and she had no doubts that they’d continue to squabble once she had the strength, but for now…

For now, she was just going to enjoy this.

=====================================================

Zul’vii cracked one eye open. A dark, brooding shape slouched against the wall.

“Illidan?”

Two burning green dots appeared where eyes would be. “Do you need something?” The words were growled, clipped – worried rather than angry.

“Why are you always there?”

The shape shifted. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

The half-troll smothered a grin. “Don’t you have Outland to run?”

“My minions can take care of things until you are well again.”

“…and a daughter to raise?”

“Ember can entertain herself; she usually does.”

The smothered grin died. He wasn’t rising to the bait. Was he really that worried about her? It had only been three days, and she’d gone without food or water for almost a month travelling through Shadowmoon Valley, hiding from demons and fel orcs, making her way to the Black Temple. Okay, maybe it was a little troubling that her usual font of healing magic hadn’t come back yet, but still…it had only been three days.

“Why are you so worried about me?” she asked quietly.

“Why?” The bulky shadow that was Illidan shifted, turning to face her. “Why?!?” He sounded – maybe not angry, but there was more than just concern in his voice now. “We are bonded, foolish troll. Do you know what your absence did to me? Have you any idea what would happen to me if you were to die?”

This was more like the Illidan she knew – raging and blustering and hissing unflattering descriptions rather than calling her by name. “Oh, so you’re not worried about me, you’re worried about you,” she teased.

The warm, firm chest she suddenly found her face pressed against made her pulse race, the deviation from their usual squabbling doubly unnerving for the naughty thoughts it brought to her mind.

“Arrogant whelp,” he growled softly into her ear. His arms trembled. “If you were to die, I would cease to care about anything else. I would take refuge in madness, and let the world burn around me.”

“You care?” Zul’vii whispered in amazement.

“Of course I care,” he snapped, holding her tighter.

The half-troll licked her lips. “You…never showed it.”

A pause, then- “I should have. I’m sorry.”

An apology? On top of everything else, this made Zul’vii wonder if she was lying out in the wastes somewhere, hallucinating. “Illidan, you’re scaring me. This isn’t like you.”

“You can barely feed yourself. You’re scaring me. I will not waste your energy maintaining the charade that I do not care!”

“What about Tyrande?” she asked somewhat desperately.

“Tyrande is happy with my brother. They have a son. They are safe.”

“But don’t you want-”

“I want you to get better, you oblivious half-breed!” Illidan snarled. “Why are you wasting your breath questioning me? I thought I made myself perfectly clear!”

To his utter surprise, the troll in his arms burst into tears.

“Zul’vii…” Illidan loosened his grip and brushed her cheek gently with one thumb. “Zul’vii, what’s wrong?”

“I never knew if you cared about me at all,” she sobbed, “or if I was only useful to you. I…I…”

“Oh, Zul’vii…no. No, I’m sorry. I was a fool.”

“I care about you, Illidan,” she choked out, pressing her face against his chest again.

“Foolish troll,” he murmured fondly. “You should have chosen someone better to bond to.”

“That’s why I chose you.” She took a deep, shuddering breath, the wave of turbulent emotion beginning to pass. “You needed me.”

“I still need you, Zul’vii,” he whispered, throat tight. “Not your healing – you. Please don’t leave me again.”

The half-troll’s fingers crept up Illidan’s cheek until she could rest her palm there. “You really care? Enough that you’re swallowing your pride to admit it?”

“As I told my brother, my life has taught me to value what I have. I would sacrifice much more than my pride for you.”

“Can’t have that.” Zul’vii took another deep breath, this one steadier. “I guess I have to get better so you can keep being the grumpypants everyone’s used to, huh? It’s got to be hard to rule the world when you’re watching me sleep.”

“Too late,” he growled. “I’ve already gone soft because of Ember. You’ll need to make a full recovery and pester me at all hours if you want me grumpy, and even then I’m more likely to be pleased that you’re fully recovered.” He smiled at her indignant look. “Or you can get used to an Illidan Stormrage who’s not full of misdirected anger for a change.”

“Is such a thing possible?” Zul’vii asked, returning the smile.

“You’ll have to get better and see,” he replied loftily.

The half-troll laughed, surprised that she could.

=========================================================

When Zul’vii opened her eyes, she discovered that the sense of being watched by a powerful, demonic entity came not from Illidan guarding her sleep, but from the shining golden eyes of a young girl.

“You’re Ember, right?”

The girl nodded. “Daddy went to get food, so I’m watching you!” She tilted her head. “Daddy said you were important to him, like Mommy. Are you gonna stay here for a while?”

“Illidan asked me not to leave, so yes. I’ll probably be staying for a very long time.”

Ember’s face twisted up in pain, or intense concentration.

“Ember? What’s wrong?”

“Need to bite,” the girl ground out, little hands fisted so tightly her arms shook.

As Zul’vii was trying to figure out what that meant, the door swung open and Illidan strode into the room, a tray in one hand while the other held the door out of the way. With a howl of sheer feral rage, Ember threw herself at his leg and wrapped her limbs around it, biting ferociously. Illidan seemed not to notice as he crossed the room, except to stretch one arm down as he neared the bed. Ember took what was clearly the bait, abandoning leg for arm and climbing up to sit on his shoulder, growling fiercely and biting his ear with audible strength. Cartilage cracked and dark blood dripped, but the half-demon didn’t even wince. Once the tray had been set where Zul’vii could reach it easily, he picked up the slab of raw, greenish meat sitting well away from the usual fruit, bread, and cheese, and held it calmly up to the ear being chewed on. Again Ember took the bait, clinging to his arm with her legs while she snatched the meat with both hands and chewed gleefully on it, still growling.

“I take it Archimonde figured out that hurting you would hurt me,” he said calmly as he sat down, shifting his arms so that Ember was cradled to his chest rather than dangling upside down.

Zul’vii just stared. “Illidan, she bit you. You’re bleeding.” Something twitched inside her, but the font of her healing power was still not where it should be.

“It will heal.” He smiled at the growling child in his arms. “You were very good, Ember. I’m very proud of you.”

“Proud…” The troll levered herself up on one elbow. “Illidan, she bit you! You’re bleeding!”

“It will heal,” he repeated firmly, a slight edge in his voice. “It is more important that she remembered to bite me and retained enough control to wait for me, rather than attack you in your weakened state.”

Zul’vii stared some more. “I didn’t think about it like that,” she said finally.

“Eat. You need to regain your strength.”

As the troll selected a piece of fruit, she chuckled. “You sound like somebody’s mother.”

Illidan smiled, making her heart thud loudly in her ears. “I had a good teacher. Ember? Can you use words again?”

A slightly-sullen growl was the child’s only reply.

“When you can use words again, come tell me and we’ll play.” He let his grip go slack, and smiled in delight as Ember threw her arms around his neck in a hug, then grabbed the rest of her meal and scampered out of the room. “She goes feral when the demon tries to take control, or when she wants to fight him back away from the front of her mind, so that he can’t whisper to her. The naga and fel orcs are all used to her, and she’s been so good lately that I didn’t remember to warn you.”

“That’s why you’re raising her? These attacks?”

Illidan nodded. “Tyrande was at her wit’s end, and my brother was no better at figuring out how to deal with her. When she goes feral, she is a creature of pure instinct. She does not recognize the world around her; her mind is entirely occupied with the battle for control. Only by working with her instincts can we help her expand that control. How long did she hold it back before I arrived?”

“Maybe a minute?”

“Did she say anything during that time?”

Zul’vii frowned. “I asked her what was wrong, and she said ‘need to bite’. I wondered what she meant by that, but now it all makes sense. She’d asked me if I was going to stay a while, and I said yes. I guess the demon saw an opportunity.”

“I’ll ask her later,” Illidan said. “It could be that he said something to enrage her.”

“Is it important to find out?” Zul’vii asked curiously, chewing a piece of bread.

“If the demon is trying to drive a wedge between us in any way, I want to know about it. I am a firm believer in knowing how my enemy thinks, particularly when he is so close to someone I care about.”

==============================================================

“Illidan?”

Zul’vii’s hesitant voice called him back from the dark places in his mind, back to where he sat against the wall in the room he’d claimed for sleeping, back to where his troll lay limply in his bed. The arcane constructs that replaced his eyes flared into being with a thought, and focused on her.

She licked her lips. “You were having a nightmare.”

The muscles of his neck ached, as did his fisted hands. He said nothing, not bothering to deny it, knowing she would understand his silence to be assent.

“Hold me?”

And there it was – permission to do exactly what he’d yearned to do, what he’d missed these past three years. He would not take her for granted again, would not trespass on her by taking the liberties he once did, but he would not deny her anything now and she knew that. If she wanted him to hold her, who was he to refuse? Slowly he climbed to his hooves, forcing himself to act with restraint, and moved over to the nest of tangled furs and cloth that passed for his bed. He lay down beside her, smothering a sigh of relief, and pulled her to him until her back was warm against his chest. She nestled sweetly against him, every curve fitting just right in his arms, and he inhaled the scent of her hair. Tension bled out of him as he exhaled.

“Don’t make me sleep alone again,” Zul’vii commanded gently, knowing that Illidan would do for her what he would not do for himself.

“Arrogant, selfish whelp,” he growled affectionately into her ear, arms tightening around her.

The memories of how painfully honest he’d been flocked to the front of her mind and Zul’vii swallowed them back. She was just as guilty of not showing him that she cared. “We’re bonded,” she said in a small voice. “I missed you, too.”

The tears he could not shed choked him and he held her tightly, trembling slightly, comforted by the knowledge that she would understand the depths of the emotions that shook him. Her fingers ran gently up and down his arms, reassuring without words. She knew. She understood. She was his.

Illidan slipped back into slumber, secure in knowing that Zul’vii’s presence would keep the nightmares away.

==============================================================

“Daddy Daddy Daddy!”

Illidan paused, warglaives held mid-strike, as Ember charged in and latched onto his leg, crying hysterically. The weapons were banished instantly and he lifted the child easily so she could cling to his neck. “Ember, what’s wrong?”

“Mama Zul’vii can’t breathe!”

The decision to attach ‘mama’ to his troll’s name would normally have been reason to pause, but the words following that turned his blood to ice. The world shifted and warped, Ember clinging to his torso as he dropped to his knees beside his startled and alarmed half-troll. Clawed fingers gently checked her throat for a pulse, found it, and lifted her to a sitting position. He paused.

“Zul’vii, are you alright?”

“Still weak, but nothing hurts anymore.”

“No trouble breathing?”

“No, why?”

Illidan looked down at Ember’s tear-streaked face.

“He said she couldn’t breathe,” Ember half-sobbed, “and that’s why she wasn’t getting better.”

“What did he say, exactly?” Illidan asked gently.

“He said the air here was suffocating her.”

Troll and half-demon exchanged a look.

“Did he explain what ‘suffocating’ meant?”

Ember nodded. “It’s when air goes in and comes out but it doesn’t do any good.”

Illidan smiled. “Tell him ‘thank you’ for me, Ember.”

Zul’vii looked at him curiously. “What did I just miss?”

“Archimonde just let slip the reason your strength hasn’t come back.”

“He’s really angry, Daddy,” Ember giggled.

“I need you to fetch me the purple jewel in my work room, can you do that?”

The girl nodded and dashed off.

“You gonna tell me what dis is all about?” Zul’vii asked, accent slipping slightly.

“In a minute.”

“You’re too smug, you overgrown bat.”

“You’re impatient, you lightning bug whelp.”

Ember dashed back in, a polished crystal the size of Illidan’s hand clutched in hers. “Here it is, Daddy!”

“Excellent. Thank you, Ember.” Illidan pulled the child close with one arm, dropped a kiss on her head, and handed the crystal to the half-troll. “Hold that. Keep it against your skin at all times.”

“What is it?” Zul’vii asked, cradling it gently.

“I’ve been working with the crystals found in this area. They are marvelously flexible, magically speaking. That one, I have enchanted to absorb and store demonic energy. I intended it to be a source of power to draw on, but if it keeps you free of the fel taint that permeates this land, I will have discovered a way to keep Kael’s people safe.”

The troll frowned. “I thought it was odd that they weren’t here with you.”

“The fel taint was making them sick. I sent them away with my blessing to find a cleaner place to live. But if this works…” He stared off into space. “If this works, I can use the larger crystals…on a much grander scale, I could potentially clean the land and let it start to heal. So yes,” he said in a lighter tone, ruffling Ember’s hair. “I am very grateful to Archimonde for his help in this.”

Ember giggled again. “He’s using bad words, Daddy.”

“Well, don’t you repeat them until you’re at least fourteen.”

“Yes, Daddy.”